"The most beautiful people we have known are those who have known defeat, known suffering, known struggle, known loss, and have found their way out of the depths. These persons have an appreciation, a sensitivity, and an understanding of life that fills them with compassion, gentleness, and a deep loving concern. Beautiful people do not just happen."


From 0-60 in a matter of seconds...

Ok, so as of Friday my timeline was something like this - 3 weeks until my restaging tests (CT/PET/Bone Marrow) and then start the SCT process. We were still waiting on my insurance to approve and it could take this long. So, I was preparing myself for a late Sept. start. I was ok with that. I was actually looking forward to a little break, having a few weeks of feeling good rather than one. I was starting to plan a surprise birthday party for Gabriel, do some shopping, etc...Although it was moving slower than I had anticipated, I was starting to look forward to the down time.

Someone turned on warp speed and I'm still trying to catch my breath. I got my schedule in the hospital and it turns out my insurance must have approved the sct procedure because all of a sudden I am booked through September. I have a complete lung function test this Friday, my CT scans next Tuesday and then my PET scan next Friday, the 14th. I am also scheduled to be admitted that day. Admitted for what, I don't know but I am assuming it will be part 1 of the sct process - mobilization of my stem cells. So, that's 5 days of chemo and then coming back to collect my stem cells. Wow, I was hoping it would be this soon but I was getting used to having a break from chemo. Now, I am just trying to figure out what to do first and if I am really, really ready to do this. It's kind of like giving birth I guess, whether or not you're ready it's going to happen. I also hate the fact I will be admitted the day before Gabriel's birthday. I feel so bad! Since we've been married something always happens near his birthday and it's always been an inside joke between us, like what's going to happen this year?? Gosh, at this rate I think we're going to skip his birthday for a while. I just wanted to make him something special and now I'll be in the hospital and he'll be alone with 4 kids. Happy Birthday, Baby.



JuRi said...

I have checked your blog out for the first time! You're beautiful! Keep fighting, my prayers are with you! I will continue to watch you through this thing we call life! Bless you and I loved the pics of the zoo, quite interesting!
Julie (Crisco)Ricketts

Brandy said...

Julie!!! Hi sweetie! Thanks for the prayers, it really means a lot to me and my family.

Lots of love to you,